Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Ollie and I had our passport photos taken yesterday. The Home Office now issue a document, 6 pages long of what is/isn't acceptable. To sum up, an expressionless zombie with zero personality should fit the bill. (No wonder we Brits have that bubbly reputation). In the old days (pre children), I would have blow dried my hair, slapped on full makeup and carefully chosen jewellery to match my outfit, in preparation for a document that everyone seems to delight in zooming in on the last page. Yesterday, no makeup (considered camouflage), flat hair & tied back (you can't have it on your face at all) and no accessories - they might detract from your face. Last but not least, no smiling but lips showing. When someone says 'no smiling' it makes you swallow your lips - I expect you are doing it now. So, I'm all done, an expressionless Stepford Wife. So, I then give Ollie all these instructions. The result, this little form sitting on a stool, shoulders hunched up around his ears performing his best vampire impersonation. I wouldn't mind but Ollie never smiles in photos at the best of times. 45 minutes later we were out of there with instructions to return today to collect them as they have to be manipulated to official Home Office size. Ollie's lucky, at least he can have a second shot in 5 years time, my next one will be in my 50's, eek!